This letter has been sent to you to stop you from sending out chain letters. The original was written in the 3rd century A.D. by a deranged member of the Most Holy Post. That version vanished during the Spanish Inquisition (Nobody expects the Spanish Inquisition!!!!!!!!!). More recently, it was communicated telepathically to Shirley MacLaine by monks on the planet Mongo in the eighth dimension. Now it has been sent to you. Good things will soon be happening to you if you follow the instructions given in this letter.
This is no joke!
If you do what this letter says to do, every person who owes you money will repay you. The IRS will never audit you again. Oprah will invite you to her house to sit at the pool while Rachael Ray is serving up some Pomegranate Martini's.
To get your good fortune rolling, you must keep this letter for the next five years. If at any time during that time you receive a chain letter, don't send out any copies of it. Instead, you must send this anti-chain letter back to the person who sent you the chain letter. At the end of five years you must do the following 'de-briefing' ceremony:
- Throw salt over your shoulder.
- Throw salt over your momma's shoulder.
- Throw your momma over your shoulder.
- Walk under a ladder.
- Pray the rosary.
- Pray the zippity-doo-dah, zippity-ay.
Mix 2 frogs, 3 locks of Michael Jackson's hair, 2 turtledoves, and the remains of this letter in a cauldron and boil at 375 degrees for 2 hours and 3 minutes. Place the whole mixture in the microwave on saute for 6:53 and place in serving bowls, then chill. Gargle, then spit.
DO NOT IGNORE THIS LETTER OR SOMEDAY YOU WILL DEFINITELY DIE…!
Send E-Mail Junk Responsibly...!
